first day

last year, i posted this picture of my first day of school (ever) beside my first official day as a professor...

my mom said everyone told her she was going to cry when i left for my first day of school.  she waited at the bus stop with me, made sure i got on and found a seat, and then i was off. but she didn't cry.  she said i was so excited to be going to school that she couldn't help but be happy (little did she know, i would stay in school until i was 27, and then teach so i could act like i was still in school. oy vey). she was waiting at the bus stop at the end of the day. when i got off and she asked how my day was, i threw my hands in the air and jumped straight up, "GREAT!".....and THAT'S when she started crying...because i didn't "need her anymore".

yesterday was sort of like that, only slightly more irrational. we dropped Will off at daycare before work.  the teachers were extremely nice...made me feel comfortable before i left him. he didn't cry at all. brian was glad he did ok when we left, but in some ways (here it comes...the irrational part), i wanted him to cry...i wanted him to miss me and want ME to stay with him. but he's three months old. and i was being ridiculous.

so, i went to mcdonalds and got a coffee and the greasiest thing on the menu and cried in my car.

when we picked him up, he was just fine...had a great day according to his teachers. they said he was so sweet, and they wanted to take him home (um, no).  that made me feel good. but i still cried all the way home. the little guy must have been busy, because he slept practically all evening and almost the whole night. 

let's hope i can pull it together on monday when i actually have students....bring on the mom guilt!